The liberating nature of working content-free.
Lately, I spoke to an old friend who was considering signing up for therapy. He had the usual questions, like ‘how long does it take?’ ‘What’s the best approach?’ ‘How much should I expect to spend?’ I was only too happy to answer. I offered my own course of treatment, and a referral to a colleague if he’d prefer to speak to a stranger. However, something else seemed to be bothering him, and when I coaxed him a little more, he had this to say:
“The problem is, I know I’m going to have to talk about my past at some point. I really don’t want to, and I’m pretty convinced something bad will happen when I do. I know I’ll have to talk about it one day, but I’m just….not ready yet.”
A few days previous, I had seen a post on social media asking “people who go to therapy; how do you trust someone enough to reveal all your secrets to them?” The answers were full of words like ‘professionalism’ and ‘rapport’, both very important, of course, but it got me thinking:
Do people just not know what working Content-Free is?
Well in that case, I’ll explain; working content-free means that, instead of taking a detailed history of the clients background and traumas, the therapist focuses on asking about the effect that the client wants the therapy to have. This does not mean that you don’t work on the clients past at all. After all, if you ignore the trauma that caused the problem, it’s not going to go away. But if you ‘talk around it’, you can often find out the really important information without going into uncomfortable detail.
Common questions I would ask a content-free client include:
“What triggers the anxiety/depression/‘problem state?’ Is it always the same/similar things or is there variation? Do we know what memory or memories are the likely cause of this, or are we not sure?”
Sometimes the client will come in knowing full well what trauma or difficult memories need to be worked on. In that case, I would ask ‘Was this an isolated incident? Is it linked to any other memories/trauma? Is this something that happened in the past, or is it still going on today?’
Like any good therapist, I have many different exercises and approaches in my ‘mental toolbox’. Asking these kind of questions allows the client to give important details about how they understand the problem, and often that is all that’s needed to figure out what tools need to be used.
Does the client not know the cause? Well, there are techniques to find it. Has the client worked through their trauma with a different therapist, but there’s just a vague sense of upset that hasn’t gone away yet? There’s a treatment for that, too. How do I figure out what technique I should be using? Its actually quite simple:
I explain available techniques and their effects to the client and let them decide for themselves.
You have to remember that when someone signs up for therapy, their unconscious already knows everything about the problem, and their conscious mind has at least admitted that there is a problem. If the solution is properly explained, as well as the parameters in which it would work, then they will know, even just instinctively, if it’s right for them.
Another important thing to bear in mind; trance doesn’t always have to feel like you’re going into a ‘deep sleep’. I often find that clients prefer a light relaxation state as they do their internal work, because, not only does this mean they can clearly hear me and ask questions, but they can come back to full wakefulness if they feel too uncomfortable.
Honestly, the key here is the same as any other form of therapy; the client needs to feel comfortable enough to be vulnerable, and as therapists, creating that environment is our first and most important job. If that means giving them some space away from the problem, then that’s absolutely what we should do.
These days, when a friend asks about therapy, I like to tell them the following;
“In some cases, all I know about a client is ‘something happened to them when they were young and it was very bad.’ That lack of knowledge doesn’t hinder treatment at all. In fact, it helps the client feel safe enough to do find the healing they need.”